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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would file for divorce and ask for 1/2 the family business or life long alimony, child support and 1/2 of all real-estate and assets.  Don't wait till you find a job.  You own half that business.  You worked in that business so that was your job.

And, make a custody schedule where he is responsible 50% of the time.  Stop playing nice.

What are you waiting for?[/quote]

If I file for a divorce and split it like that, I would be moving out from the large house we currently all live in (my ex will retain it, and I will retain smaller one as I can't afford the large one), into a much smaller townhouse or even an apartment. I will live on 120K net annual income (down from 440K current net income). I won't be getting much alimony or child support because of the assets that I would be getting in the divorce, and because I married my jerk very young and I am in my early 40s. I feel like he would increase his lifestyle and net income divorcing by 72% and my standard of living will go down significantly. I don't want that to happen, until I am able to "make up" at least some of that lost income.

Plus, I don't want to split the custody 50/50 - my child is in high school and I want to have 100% time with him the last years before I send him off to college....

I don't plan to date, re-marry, I hate men and just want to grow my child until college in the house where he was born.

I have a good lawyer. He thinks it is beneficial for me to delay, as all marital assets (including the jerk pension) are appreciating, the longer we are married.

He had a 5-year long affair, with mental and financial infidelity. [/quote]

You’re missing the point.

You can ask for whatever you want. If you want to stay in the house and have him cover the mortgage until it’s paid off, you can say “Okay, I’ll give you a divorce today if you pay me X% of business income for the next 10 years and cover the mortgage on the house. I want full custody of DC with child support and I want his college funded and a trust created for him” Ask for whatever you want. It doesn’t mean you’ll get it, but your husband seems eager to move on, and you can take advantage of that to get him to agree to a split that would make YOU feel happy granting a divorce. If he disagrees you get the satisfaction of saying to everyone  “sigh. I wanted a quick divorce but DH is dragging this out for so long... Honestly, I really wish he would move on instead of being so difficult.”

Men do this all the time. Up your game OP. And get a better lawyer.

[/quote]

I already tried to offer all the points you mentioned (education trust, pay for a mortgage of a new home for me and my son, share future business income etc) - he's greedy and refused on all points. Negotiations were conducted by a very reputable DC lawyer. So I am at the stage " I wanted a quick divorce but DH is dragging this out for so long... Honestly, I really wish he would move on instead of being so difficult"[/quote]

OP, you are being absurd.  You got screwed with the cheating but grow up, get divorced and move on.  You have $120K income a year plus child support.  You are not entitled for him to pay for a mortgage and other things.  If he started the business during marriage, you are probably entitled to half depending on how it is set up.  You are also entitled to any equity in the house post marriage.  You dragging out divorce makes no sense.  Its his house.  Move out and take your child.  In the divorce have him pay for 1/2 college outside of college savings.  If he owns the house, he shouldn't be moving out, you should.  He is better off taking this to trial.[/quote]

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