Reply to Wives of physicians--dealing with loneliness

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree, he obviously wants to work those hours.  Or else he wouldn't!!!

Where is he overnight anyways?  I'm a nurse and I don't know a lot of doctors who work 80hrs a week when they're not in residence or doing surgical training.  It's weird.  Most doctors I date actually try to work as little as possible and have 4 day weeks.

Maybe he senses you are clingy and don't have a life outside of this relationship and doesn't want to be your be all end all.

I say this with love- get a life.  You only live once and you clearly have the means to be enjoying life.  Take a class, learn to cook, take yoga, join a reading group.  I wish I had time and money to sit around feeling sorry for myself- nope.  I'm babysitting when I get off work from my real job just to pay my student loans.  You piss me off.  You have time to do things and can afford to have a life BUT YOU CHOSE NOT TO.  Too bad for you.  Everyone else can hold your hand and give you sympathy but I'm going to tell you life is short and you're wasting yours.[/quote]

Clearly you have not read the posts in this thread.  I am the OP and I like I have already mentioned, I work full-time, do volunteer work (charity work) in my spare time, go to the gym, and am in a book club, not to mention going to groups and events at my church.  So I think I am doing things, joining groups, and meeting people, but keeping busy has not helped me much with the loneliness.  You would think it would, but it just hasn't.  I don't know why.  I think because rather than just keeping busy, I am longing for connection with others--good friends to connect with, to share with, to chat with or get together with during the lonely times.  But I can't seem to find this.

And yes, I know that ER docs do shift work, but most other hospital-based (and especially surgical-based) specialties are not like that, and require very long and unpredictable hours, weekends, late nights.[/quote]

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