Reply to Why do people with demanding jobs choose to have 3+ kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have 3 kids, a c-suite job, and my dh is a big law partner.  I also spend 5 hours every week day with my kids and every minute of the weekend.  All I do is work and spend time with my family - bc I love my job and spending time with my family.  [b]I outsource every chore I can do all my time can be focused on the two things I love[/b].

And yes I have lots of nanny help but that doesn’t mean Im not spending time with my kids at the same time.  It means that I can focus on each kid some of the time(eg nanny is home for baby’s nap sat morning while DH and I are out with big kids) or have someone cooking dinner while I play with the kids vs having the stress of trying to cook with 3 little kids on me.

I would not have had 3 kids if I couldn’t afford the help bc I wouldn’t want my 52 hours a week with my kids (yes I count them) to be full of stress and trying to multitask all the time.

Maybe my kids will be spoiled bc they never see me cleaning toilets or maybe they will see that dh and I work our butts off in our paid work - I don’t know but I’m not wasting too much sleep over it given they see us contributing and working overall. I’ll make sure they know how to clean a toilet before going to college and they have chores at home now.

It’s fine if you don’t want to live this way, it’s also weird but fine if you don’t think 50+ hours a week is enough parent time for kids and dh or I should stay home instead. But to say we don’t see our kids is absurd and that’s true of all the families like mine I know - like our work lives, we are type A and we have clear goals and metrics for our personal lives and don’t let things slip [/quote]

This is us as well. Not sure what OP means by demanding jobs because I'd view teaching to be more demanding than my and my husband's desks jobs but we certainly make a lot more than teachers do. Assuming you mean demanding jobs that make a lot of money, we outsource cleaning, laundry, yard work, etc., so that we work really hard from 7:30-4 while our kids are at school (they leave the house at 7:30 and come back at 4:30, no before or after care but that includes the driving), sometimes stop at 4 and help them with homework, sometimes keep working until 5 and the nanny helps them for that hour or takes them to play outside once they're done, then we have complete family time from 5-8 when they go to bed. (We also have an hour in the mornings getting them ready for school and having breakfast, so we have between 4 and 5 hours each day with our kids during the week, like PP). We can work more after they go to sleep if needed, and sometimes we'll work in the morning before they get up, but we very rarely work weekends (sometimes we will plan it so that one of us is doing something with them while the other works if needed). So we spend a ton of time with our kids because we're not busy cleaning the house or mowing the lawn or running any other errands (our nanny is basically our personal assistant while the kids are at school so she does things like handle Amazon returns, etc.). The money our jobs pay us provides us the opportunity to outsource the things we don't want to do anyway and spend more time with our kids. We also both love our jobs and get a lot of fulfillment from doing them. I don't get why this, which works for us and obviously others, bothers anyone?[/quote]

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