Reply to Am I Asking Husband To Do Too Much?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Team DH here. An infant that little doesn’t require much. I doubt it takes you all day to do all of those things. Cleaning maintenance only tasks an hour a day tops. [/quote]

OP you sound lazy.  An normal infant isn’t that much work. Plus you have a weekly cleaning lady.  You have nothing to complain about, sorry.  [/quote]

OP here. I’m not lazy. We have a bi-weekly cleaning lady who does deep cleaning. I do everything else while trying to pump to get my supply up, and recovering from a fourth degree tear. I still wake up multiple times while baby sleeps to pump because my husband doesn’t want him on formula.

Do you even have a kid or are you a man who spends no time with his child like some of the other posters? [/quote]

Yes, I have three of them, all breastfed, they all wanted to be held all day, two had colic until 4 months old.

Now I’m done being snarky.  I see your problem and it isn’t your DH.  It is pumping.  You are fighting a battle you are likely going to lose and going about it wrong.  If you’ve been home with your baby and breastfeeding on demand for the past 10 weeks, there is no need to pump all the time and wake in the night to pump.  You feed your baby when they are hungry.  They will go in spurts when they want to breastfeed what seems like all day long, hardly taking a break at all.  That is normal, and that is how your supply increases to meet their demand.  It does not mean your supply is low.  The pump messes up the supply/demand.  You cannot fix this with a pump.  And if you are barely hanging on now with breastfeeding and trying to pump, it will be complete game over when you go back to work. The pumping is making you crazy.  I’ve seen this time and time again.  Drop the pumping, feed your baby as frequently as he wants, even if it is every hr.  If he is a good sleeper, pump ONCE two hours after your final feed at bedtime, before you go to sleep yourself.  That will help build a stash to have when you go back to work and if he is only waking once at night to feed, your body should have a couple hrs after you pumped to replenish.

And get a ergo or baby wrap.  Wear baby in wrap while he naps so you can move about and use both hands to get things done. 
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Sorry but you’re an idiot who knows very little about breastfeeding. You’re lucky you never dealt with supply issues. Many women have to pump after feeding because they don’t make enough. Many have to pump during the night to keep their supply up. Pumps don’t mess up supply. You sound very uneducated on this matter. Many women will have low supply no matter what they do. No amount of feeding will ever work. [/quote]

OP here. I don’t actually nurse. Baby refused to latch and no LC could help us. I exclusively pump and bottle feed. I don’t make that much and I need to wake every 3 hours at night to pump in order to make enough for baby to eat. I have tried reducing pumping or skipping a pumping session at night, and it decreased my supply. I pumped 8 times a day ( every 3 hours) to get what baby needs.

My husband doesn’t want to supplement because he feels I should pump and feed since I’m home. He wants to make sure our baby is getting the best nutrition during the pandemic and flu/cold season. I do agree but I would be fine with supplementing. I don’t want to fight with him on it so I just wake up to pump.

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OP here. This is my schedule. I pump 7, 10, 1, 4, 7, 10, 1, and 4/4:30. Baby eats 7, 9:30, 12, 3, 6, 7:30, and around 4am. I make 24-28oz ( 3-4oz per 20-30 minute pump session) to feed him. I have tried many things and nothing has really increased my supply or helped me be able to go a long stretch without pumping. I lose my supply every time I do. I guess I wouldn’t say I have low supply since it’s average, but I need to wake up to pump in order to get that amount. [/quote]

Cut out the 1am pump.  You will feel a million times better.  If that drops your supply enough that you have to supplement a little, so what.  Going back to work is highly likely to drop your supply too.  You will likely need to supplement whether you want to or not in the very near future as baby is going to only want more milk (peak is around 5 months) and you can’t really pump much more frequently than you already are.  Your supply is not going to keep up.  Not trying to be discouraging, but it is just reality.  There really is no sense in torturing yourself to pump round the clock.  If you slept better you wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed in the day.  One baby (and mom) that sleeps well at night, even if naps he wants to be held, isn’t that much work.  
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