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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was in a similar position to OP, had one kid and was completely exhausted all the time and couldn't believe it when friends started to announce second pregnancies once their older kids turned one. My DH also used to travel alot (pre-COVID), so I was single parenting alot, and we don't have any family in the area to help. But as my DD got closer to two years, I saw how things might get easier - she can feed herself, entertain herself, and tell us what she wants. And worse case scenario I can park her in front of a screen if I really need to do something.  I'm now pregnant with DD#2, they'll be a little less than 3 years apart. I'm hoping they'll still have some common interests and get along, but at the same time DD#1 will be potty trained and patient enough to understand when we need to take care of the baby, etc.

Also, a perspective from the other side. My sister and I are 8 years apart, and it's just the two of us. Growing up we didn't have anything in common (what can an 10 year old and an 18 year old have in common?) and I always felt like I was a second mom to her, and she felt the same. However, now that we're older (late 20s and 30s) I'm very thankful that I have someone else to help manage our parents. Otherwise all of their energy, questions, nagging would be falling on me, but at least now they have somewhere else to direct their energy. I know my DH feels the same, his father passed away suddenly two years ago and his sister (5 years older) has taken on the bulk of emotional care for their mom (they live about 1000 miles from us). Otherwise he would have felt alot of pressure for us to move or to move his mother closer to us. This is something I hear from my friends who are only children, it wasn't bad growing up, but now that they're older and their parents are aging they wish they had a sibling. Obviously there are no guarantees in life and the burden could still fall  on one of your children. [/quote]

I’m an Only dealing with rapidly declining health of my aging parents. I’m so grateful that I’m an Only and I don’t have to add another person into this mix. I can make unilateral decisions without having to consult someone else. And I know so many families that have horrible experiences with siblings trying to deal with aging parents. From one sibling being dumped on to do all work (and still keep the other sibling informed, who usually feels like they have equal say in what gets done while doing none of the work), to siblings that have very different ideas on what to do.

So has dealing with this current crisis been difficult. YES! So much harder than I thought it was going to be. But grateful everyday that it’s just me. [/quote]

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