Reply to Convince me to have more than 1

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Convince me to have more than 1"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I wish you the best of luck in your decision. Here’s what I can tell you as the former mom of one and now a mom of more than one (my personal experience, anyway): that first baby is the game changer who turns your lives upside down and sends you from functional adult married people to tired and scrambling parent people. With that first kid, every moment is new and different and you are learning as you go, and it’s HARD. The first six weeks of my oldest’s life were the hardest weeks of my young child parenting years. And he remained a difficult baby through at least a year, as it was just who he was - but we were also inexperienced parents and hadn’t figured much out just yet.

We decided to have a second when our first was 15 months old (I too was in my 30s and felt time pressure). Our second baby didn’t feel like twice the work in any capacity (other than diapers I guess), because he was such a laid back little guy AND we already knew that parenting an infant would start hard but get easier. In my personal experience, the presence of a sibling for our first made parenting EASIER for me because my first child had a playmate. The boys are still, at ages 14 and 12, very close even though their personalities could not be more different. One is a nerdy brainiac with no athletic ability. The other is a goofball super athlete. These “types” of kids might not gravitate toward each other at school so in many ways they’ve taught one another about cross-social group acceptance. (I know it’s weird that I say that but I truly see it play out.) Our boys have an awesome bond and it’s something that gives me a lot of comfort. And, I will say that with “only” two kids, you can still divide and conquer with your spouse, or hand both over and it doesn’t feel like too much. Which brings me to....

the third child.  Yep, we decided on another. In my experience, that third kid is where 2+1 somehow equaled 40 in terms of work and parental exhaustion. But we were “pros” by then and made it through. That said, I can certainly see why people call it at two and don’t make that leap, because man oh man, that’s where it felt exponential.

I truly wish you the best. There are pros and cons and VERY strong opinions about one versus more than one, and only you can decide what’s right for your family. If all else fails, consult the Magic 8 Ball (ask me how we decided on that last kid...just kidding.)[/quote]

Came here to say this. The jump to 2 was not as rough as the jump to 1. Give yourself a few more months, then revisit. Kids change so fast. Your feelings might too.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics