Reply to Do most affairs eventually come out?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It usually comes out. More and more will come out too, as most affairs happen in the workplace and most affairs happen when there is a disparity in the levels of "power."  Boss and secretary. Doctor and nurse. Lawyer and paralegal. Exec and intern. It is pathetic, really, but in the end I think most men that are drawn into affairs are damaged individuals who need that constant sexual confirmation and ego stroking that this kind of power structure gives them.

But the modern day child psychiatry research indicates that the entire family be given age-approproate versions of the truth when parents divorce, rather than gaslighting them or leaving them to figure it out on their own.  I mean, adults take years and years to recover from a divorce and for decades the advice had been to just reassure the kids that they are loved and their lives are being ripped part because mommy and daddy just can't get along.

Affairs hurt many, many people, and none of those people agreed to assist in the cover up.  You can't betray people like that and then expect them to shield you from the public shame you so rightly deserve for your actions.

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Omg. YES.

You said this so well.

+100[/quote]

I don't know - I don't think my kids (at 2 and 5) needed to know the reason other thank mommy and daddy couldn't live together. But I appreciate the sentiment of the post.

I think usually the spouse will find out eventually. Outsiders, even close friends may not know however. I didn't tell people about my spouses infidelity and so many people just think I left cause I'm a b*tch I'm sure. I felt like I was being the bigger person (but I do sort of regret protecting him). My point is, there's more cheating than people know amount their circles.

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