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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Only 2% of affair partners end up together.  And 2nd marriages have a 65-75% divorce rate, it goes up from there...[/quote]

The person someone cheats with tends not to be as attractive, interesting, engaging, etc. as the primary partner who is being cheated on.

Rick Reynolds, LCSW says…

“I have never seen a situation where I felt an individual “affaired up”- meaning that they end up with a better person. It may seem like a better decision at the time, but it will prove it to be a step down.”

If nothing else, it will be a step down in terms of maturity, character, integrity, intelligence, loyalty, spirituality, sincerity, etc.

The reasons for why a person “affairs down” are potentially limitless, but the one noticed most often seems to be that the affair partner made the cheater feel good while stroking his/her ego so much that it didn’t matter what he/she looked like or how his/her character was.

Basically, the wayward spouse is needy and looking for someone to boost his/her ego and winds up looking for someone beneath him/her.

This person will make the cheater feel superior, if only temporarily. The easiest women to pick up are "unhappily married women". You aren't getting the cream of the crop there.

“People have affairs even when they have a good sex life and feel connected to their partners,” she says. While she in no way recommends infidelity, when it does happen, Esther Perel views it as an opportunity to “look under the hood” to see how the straying partner needs to change and dig into how the couple interacts in order to strengthen the relationship moving forward. 
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