Reply to If you’ve been with your partner for 12-20 + years & have kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think COVID has given me too much time to think about this but I just think this is the cruelty of life -- dating and sex with someone new is exciting and hot, but scary and unpredictable. Marriage (at best) is secure and safe and comes with true emotional intimacy, but it's boring and not like, horny. At all.

I also think it matters where you were in life when you got married. I married my husband after a slew of bad boys because I wanted to settle down with someone sweet and devoted. I'm glad I did, but I often feel like he's punching above his weight and it depresses me.

I just read a super hot romance novel (LOL) and it made me so jealous and depressed and nostalgic for having hot sex with a hot new guy, but after the characters fell in love it became comfortable and way less hot. And it was a romance novel! So, it's just life and human nature. Don't beat yourself up. [/quote]

The Amish have Rumspringa, essentially a two year break and then they come back to the community.  How awesome if marriages could have a short break where people could go have fun, passionate sex again!  And come back home to stability.  People do it anyway when they cheat, if only there was an ethical way to do it without hurting others.

Security and longevity suffocate passion.  Kudos to the few people on here that found the balance.[/quote]

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