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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let him file. Then fight him tooth and nail for full custody and every penny you can squeeze out of him. Sounds like a loser anyway. You will be fine. Oh, and line up a date as soon as possible and rub his face in it. [/quote]

WTF?

It sounds like the DH is being reasonable. If they have 50/50 custody and similar incomes, OP might not even qualify to receive  child support.

If you’re both reasonable, you can probably save a ton on lawyers and just use a mediator. If you push for crazy things like full custody, don’t be surprised if he fights back. The lawyers will be the only ones who win in that situation. I also think it’s interesting that your son chose to stay with his dad instead of joining you on your weekend trip. Could the son be a lot more introverted (like his father) than you’d care to admit? Maybe if 50/50 custody isn’t on the table he would chose to live with his dad instead of OP... Then she’s stuck never seeing her kid and paying child support. Don’t be stupid and don’t try to push your luck. [/quote]

Op here.

That is what he wants to do, avoid using attorneys to save on legal fees to pay down debt instead.

He has always been reclusive. The more time he spent with my family though, the less he wanted to. He said he feels like there’s no joy in our marriage. It was our sixth wedding anniversary a few weeks ago. He had a big breakfast spread for me and a card with flowers. I didn’t get him anything in return because we said we weren’t doing gifts.

He then was upset today that I am able to plan our my nieces and nephews birthdays but apparently "do nothing" for him. I think he is a borderline narcissist because he sets me up for things like that.

And for the record, his family isn’t perfect and HIS parents are also alcoholics. That’s why he never sees them. [/quote]

Op he spent time around your family and it didn't work.  You shouldn't be fighting him on this.  He doesn't want your child around an alcoholic, good decision on his part.  If he did a nice breakfast spread for you, did you bother to do a nice dinner for him?  If doesn't have to be a gift it can just be something thoughtful.  Even if you weren't planning on it how hard would it have been to just get something throughout the day.  He is right, your marriage sounds cold and it isn't him.

If he doesn't want to see his own parents who were alcoholics then I can't imagine why you would expect him to be around yours.  He is not a narcissist, it just sounds like you two are not suited to each other.  I agree with him, keep the lawyers out of it and get a mediator.  Somehow with your background I don't think you'll do this, you will create trouble for him get lawyers but in the end you will only bring yourself down end up with your original debts and a whole heap of new debt and then cry victim.[/quote]

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