Reply to Recover from an affair (need advice from others who strayed)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote] Following here - no real advice. Also had an affair that got discovered. I am not in love with AP and we aren't in close contact anymore. The physical side of my marriage died a while ago. It's dead again and I am fine in the short term without sex and intimacy if my wife needs space to heal. In the long term, don't know and would be willing to go to counseling if she would too.[/quote]

Why would your wife have any interest in being intimate with you if you cheated on her?  Are you in individual counseling to figure yourself out?  You need to be the one to help her heal.  What steps are you taking to do that?  Sounds like you think this should just be swept under the rug and in time she will want you again.  I’m Kobe if blown away by your j ok ask of self-awareness and apparently lack of remorse.  Get the book “How to Help Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair” by Linda MacDonald.  You are the one that needs to do the heavy lifting here, it’s not on her to fix what you broke.[/quote]

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