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General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "Stay at Home vs Retired"
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[quote=Anonymous] What will your husband doing with the housekeeper, op? I’m only half-kidding, there is a reason that humor exists. More importantly, if he retires early, he will have nothing to occupy his mind, no social outlet, no peer group. It’s easy to do things that are harmful in that situation. Both my parents, who have each other were shocked at how empty the first few months of retirement were. My dad pointed out that for the first time in his life he didn’t have a mom, a teacher, a boss or even children dictating how you spend your time and providing you with a social network. If your husband doesn’t understand your job now, he *really* won’t understand it when he is home. I’m also not surprised that this is a second marriage… for him. The selfishness, the “compromise” on number of children (and his unwillingness to emotionally support both his children) you working so you can pay for a child where you have no legal relationship while he stays home and does??? All scream that you are a trade-in, and that you got the bad end of the bargain. He is expecting you to support his son, and now you are realizing that he will do absolutely nothing for the child you and he have together, while having absolutely no empathy for your work schedule. I’d be wondering why you are in this marriage, even a dog and a young toddler have more compassion then your husband. If it were me and he wouldn’t do pickup and drop-off, I’d be putting the kid in public school and live in a bus zone for that school. I’m not kidding, I’d move if I had to do that. I’d also either fire the housekepper, or I’d have her, or find one who would do absolutely everything you needed done. If you want her to cook, she cooks. If you want her to grocery shop, she shops for groceries. If you want her to do pickup and drop-off, I’d have her do it. If you do nothing else, you want a very clear idea of what your husband plans to do with his time and energy once he is retired. Figure out why he wants to retire ideally. Even my middle-schooler said “Why would someone retire early, retirement is for old people” and she’s right, it really is. Healthy people need and want to contribute to their families and ensure their families are emotionally healthy. I’d be worried about his physical and/or mental health if your assessment that he isn’t an ass is correct. A change in desire and behavior is an indicator of a problem. for Windows 10 [/quote]
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