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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I can't believe all the bitter bitches responding to this thread.

I hear you OP. I, like you, do not expect the world to revolve around me and my children but when they beg me to come visit and bring the kids, we drop a couple of thousand to do so, packed up half our freaking house and shlepped across the country, it is kind and considerate (as a PP pointed out) for CLOSE family members to say "hey, what time would be good to meet up that works for your kids schedule?" Or for your parents or other close family member to offer a car so you can arrive late/leave early as needed, or for a close family member to ask what snacks or items they can pick up before you arrive to make your visit a little smoother. Are you *entitled* to this treatment? No, but I don't think you were saying that you were. It is simply the considerate thing to do when someone *else* drops the money and spends the effort to come to visit.

Similarly when my parents come to visit, I stock the kitchen with foods they like, pick up their preferred soap, make sure there's adequate toilet paper under the sink and clean sheets on the bed, and I don't choose activities that would be challenging for grandma to do even if my kid would love them. Why? I don't think my family are *owed* those things or the world should revolve around them, but it is the considerate thing to do as a host.[/quote]

I think the thing you are missing is people forget what it's like with little kids.  My kids are older now and wow, the details get kind of hazy!  Also, some kids really do eat whatever.  And some don't.  And some really do fine with a free and loose schedule.  And some don't.  So on top of likely genuinely not remembering just how harrowing life can be with little kids, some people's lives with kids are a little more or less harrowing too.

I always just did what I was going to do with my kids.  If they needed to be napping or going to bed, that's what they were doing.  And my one picky eater, I brought food.  Just come up with a plan where you have control over as many of the variables as you can (i.e., have food, rent or bring a car, etc.) and execute.[/quote]

So what would you have done in the above scenarios?

You show up for dinner at 5, and there is still no food at 7pm.  What time would you feed your 3 y/o?  Would you sit them down at the table to eat?  Let them run with it?  Would you eat whatever was packed too?  Or would you wait for dinner and eat with the family?

What about your sister’s Christmas brunch right at nap time?  Would you just not go?  [/quote]

And I guess I didn't address sitting down the 3 yo.  No, you feed the 3 yo casually somewhere.  At the kitchen island.  Wherever.  And if they can then stay awake while you are eating at 7pm, put on a video for them to give you 20-30 minutes to eat and they don't sit at table.  What 3 year old sits at a big dinner anyway for more than 5 minutes.[/quote]

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