Reply to Adopting after secondary infertility

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is there a for profit adoption industry? Yes of course there is, but there are also plenty of women out there that simply aren't ready to parent the children they give birth to. It's very arrogant to assume that parenting and reunification is best for all women[b]. Some women will never be good parents no matter how many resources you provide them[/b]. Assuming that providing financial resources to people will solve all of their issues is ridiculous.

I adopted my son through a semi-family member (his birth mother is the mother of my cousin's child). His BM was a teenager on her 3rd child. The 1st was/is being raised by another relative, she had the 2nd in her custody (later removed due to neglect and parental misconduct) and her 3rd child was my son.

Shortly after my son's birth she went on to commit a crime that caused her to be incarcerated. Now, she has been released and has yet another child that she is apparently parenting well. But, if she had kept a hold of all 3 of the previous children, what situation would they have found themselves in?

Adoption is a blessing. My son knows his biological siblings, has met his biological mother, grandfather and great-grandmother. Good luck OP, I hope you find a solution that works for you. [/quote]

Any adoptive mother who feels this way shouldn’t adopt. Seriously. It’s rare that the primary reason for adoption isn’t age and financial.

The old saying supports the data. Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.[/quote]

But you can't put the child's development on hold for the years it might take the birthparents to get their act together. It is extremely damaging for children to b passed around, have inconsistency in how their parents treat them or whether they can rely on their love and nurturing WHILE THE CHILDREN ARE FORMING AS HUMAN BEINGS. I definitely think this re-occurring poster was traumatized somewhere along the way...but I believe that children's rights and welfare should be put before adults'. And sometimes that means that the adult who had them loses their chance to raise them...because it would be too damaging for the child to wait out their recovery and/or maturation. [/quote]

Actually you can and that is what is done.  Kids belong first with biological families and parents have ever right get themselves together first.  [/quote]
You are a loon.[/quote]

That's ok as you are a selfish loon who does't understand that kids should be with biological families and you are really selfish to think you are entitled to that child.  I feel bad for your kids if you don't understand that most kids would prefer to be with their biological families, even bad ones given the choice.  Most people who adopt do it for their needs, not the kids.[/quote]

x100000

I honestly believe that adoption will be one of the big civil rights issues of the next 50 years.  Adoption as we know it will not exist two generations from now.  [/quote]

It will change but I doubt it will change that much in less the feds get involved and make laws for the country rather than each state having their own rules and laws.  Likewise, in less we bring placements back to the government and get rid of private agencies, agencies and facilities, it will continue to be a business.  It is now much harder to have closed adoptions and records with DNA tests, so that is one positive change.[/quote]

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