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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom is like this.  She was like this when we were kids.  I grew up in an affluent neighborhood, my parents had plenty of money, but I was always hungry.  I can remember going to people's houses and finding out that they had things like left overs and family style meals where you could choose how much you ate, and being amazed.  In my family, my mother would buy exactly what she thought we should eat for the week.  So, if we were having chicken on Tuesday she'd buy 5 chicken drumsticks, one for each family member, and 5 small rolls, and measure out exactly 5 1/2 cups of frozen vegetables.  She'd boast about how her kids always cleaned their plates, but that was because we were hungry!!
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This is so sad.[/quote]

Did your mom grow up in poverty, or have an eating disorder?  I have a relative like this, and she has both (poverty in childhood & an eating disorder). [/quote]

My mom grew up super rich on the Upper East Side.  We lived an UMC lifestyle, but I think that she interpreted that as poverty, and some of the anxiety about "waste" came from that.  She's also a borderline alcoholic, which compounds the issue because if we all get the same amount of food, but you drink 3 glasses of wine with yours, it explains why we're still hungry and you aren't!

One thing we did come to terms about is drinks.  My mother feels very strongly that one should never ask for anything that isn't served with a meal.  Like if she thinks there's enough salt, it's rude to get up and get the salt shaker from the kitchen to add.  She also thinks that this applies to beverages.  She frequently served meals where the only liquids at the the table were pre-poured glasses of milk for the children, and wine.  The first time I got up, went into her kitchen and helped myself a glass of tap water, she was horrified that I had judged her meal in that way.  We've gotten past that, at least.[/quote]

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