Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "What would you have done in this situation?"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would not leave a bike in the entrance or a place where other kids will bother it. Why did you leave it there?[/quote] Right. Because lack of parenting is always the fault of the person wholly unconnected to your child.[/quote] About twenty people have made this point. Your stubbornness in not listening to them says more about you than them.[/quote] Twenty ppl just proved why children are unruly in public, at school, restaurants, the mall, etc. Most parents don’t want to parent. They want society to provide a “safe space” where their precious child can do whatever they want while they sit and watch. [/quote] i don’t want all of society to be a “safe space” for my child. But I do expect a place that’s designated for children to be a safe space for my child. However, based on OP’s latest post, I think OP was mostly in the right. It sounds like the activity center she was at was a place meant for older children, so the toddler mom should’ve been more on guard.[/quote] You should expect to discipline and teach your child. Someone really posted that they couldn’t believe snacks were at a park bc their child was getting into them. If you cannot/choose not to control your child in public then stay in your home. [/quote] That was me. Nobody needs to be snacking constantly, not even toddlers. If your kid needs a snack, go to a space off to the side, eat the snack, then come back and play. I brought my daughter (then 18-months) to a children’s nature center this summer. The place is designed for toddlers to roam free and play. The plan was for her to explore the center, play with the toys, touch the exhibits, etc. But there was a kid there who had an open container of cheerios on his stroller bc he apparently he couldn’t live without cheerios for more than 5 seconds. So now instead of playing, my 18-month-old is being drawn like a magnet over and over to these cheerios, and I have to redirect her over and over and over. That’s not why I came to the children’s nature center.[/quote] That says more about you plan and simple. Your job is to redirect and teach, two things you don’t want to do. Clearly your child is hungry if they are so interested in the Cheerios instead of playing. [/quote] So, let’s say I go to a 2-year-old’s bday party. The party’s in a backyard and it’s just parents and a bunch of 2-year-olds. All the dads decide to sit at a table and drink beer (so, there’s a bunch of open glass bottles on the table) and play chess. All the 2-year-kids are now super interested in the open glass bottles and chess pieces, and the moms have to spend the entire party keeping them away from this table. Is the problem here the dads who decided to get this stuff out at a children’s party, or do the moms just need to suck it up and “parent”?[/quote] Ok so you’re that kind of person/parent. Completely makes sense why you want others to bend for you. You ask if they are finished and throw away the bottles. They aren’t finished with the bottles and unwilling to throw them away? You leave as that isn’t a safe environment for your child. I went to the park a of week or so ago and kids around age 3-5 had snack bags of goldfish and fruit snacks. They were carrying around these bags and of course leaving them everywhere. My baby (17 mos) picked up a bag that hadn’t been opened yet and started walking around with it. You know what I did...I threw the bag away, he cried, and I continued to follow him around. [/quote] Wow.... so you don’t think it’s the dads who are asking everyone to bend to them, by doing something inappropriate for toddlers at a toddler’s bday party? And you think it’s your job to clean up they’re bottles...? Also, shouldn’t the parents of the 3-5 year olds have been teaching their children that you don’t leave your food around in a public place? I would never let my daughter just leave her unfinished food around like that. She’s not even allowed to do that in our own house. I’m not arguing with you that if you find yourself in these situations that it’s your job to control your toddler or leave (what other choice do you have at that point?). All I’m asking is, you aren’t annoyed with the other parents in these situations, since you were doing what you were supposed to but they weren’t? You don’t think they’re putting an unfair burden on you?[/quote] No, bc I don’t try to control other ppl and every situation. The only person I can control is myself. I don’t expect people to parent their own kids bc most ppl don’t, but I will parent mine. I’m not wasting my time or energy worrying about whether something is fair when it’s easier to remove myself or the obstacle. You are choosing to attend a party and mad bc it’s not the way you want it to be. Next time, you host the party you want. I chose to go to a public park, I’m not going to reprimand kids or parents for eating. What I will do is watch my child and correct them. [/quote] I don’t think I believe you. What about this: You’re at the park on the swing set. Some teens are nearby playing soccer and they keep kicking the ball over by the swing set, narrowly missing your child several times. Do you ask them to play somewhere else, or do you just leave?[/quote] Yeah I’m not going to keep doing this with you. No response will satisfy you bc you want to control ppl and situations. You don’t have to believe me and I wouldn’t expect your personality too. You view is very narrow and anyone outside of that view is the problem. Carry on and do you. [/quote] Hmm, I mean it sounds like you just think people should be allowed to do whatever they want in public, and if you don’t like it, then you just need to suck it up or leave? That’s an interesting viewpoint. I am genuinely thinking it over. I would say that there is a standard of etiquette/behavior in any given public situation, and that at a minimum you are allowed to be annoyed with people who don’t follow those standards, and you’re possibly allowed to ask them yourself to follow the standard. Like if I’m in a restaurant and someone is talking loudly on a cell phone next to me, I think I have the right to ask them to be more quiet. To me, there is a range of standards of behavior in children’s spaces depending on what age of child the space is designed for, and I am allowed to be annoyed if others don’t respect those standards. Another example: if I’m at Starbucks with a 2-year-old, no question I keep her away from all the adults’ coffee cups. However, if we’re at the chikdren’s museum, I think it’s the adults’ responsibility to leave their coffee cups out of the way of the children. I shouldn’t have to keep reminding my 2-year-old to watch out for afults’ coffee cups at the children’s museum. I’m not really arguing at this point. I just think it’s interesting to talk about unspoken standards of behavior in public spaces.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics