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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Look... if you are from a family where this is common and no one bats an eye at divorce and adultery, you probably will be fine.  If you are from a family that values marriage, commitment, and judges adulterers harshly, then it’s not going to be easy for you to come out as a couple.  The thing with adultery is there is literally never, ever an excuse for it that can’t be countered with “end your marriage first.”  Any excuse other than that is selfish, even if you try to use your kids as an excuse.... which by the way, is actually heinously selfish, trying to make them shoulder the responsibility for your decision to cheat.

Just end your marriage before opening your legs to another man.  It might be expensive.  People will be sad.  Your kids will be upset.  If those reasons are good enough to keep you from getting divorced, they are good enough to keep you from opening your legs. [/quote]
Well, other than that it would have been harder on the kids to leave them, even half the time, with the non-cheating spouse.  I’ve ne Er cheated, but my husband yells at the kids daiily and is a narcissist.  I would leave but am just exhausted managing g him and I feel it’s unfair to leave the kids with him 50/50.  So, I am not really a marital partner, but don’t now what I’d do if tempted by someone I could actually see spending my life with. No plans on staying after kids go to college but do t know what’s best in the interim.  Keeping legs and fingers crossed![/quote]

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