Reply to At a loss- spouse openly disregarded my wishes on something

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This kind of dynamic breeds resentment that usually destroys marriages. You should ask him to go to couples counseling so that you can have effective communication about the imbalance in your relationship and you can productively convey to him how his decision to take unilateral action against your wishes impacts you and your relationship. Sounds like this is about more than this one incident and is really about you feeling like you carry the heavier load in the family and that he indulges himself at your expense while getting in the way of you getting a break/ indulging yourself. Been there, done that. Now divorced and relieved.[/quote]

Wrong.

OP has to  stop making the argument about what she "wishes" or "wants" and the fact that he doesn't give her what she "wishes" or "wants."  That makes it a directly confrontational argument.

OP needs to talk about it not by personalizing it, but from a functional perspective.

"If you buy that boat, WE will not be able to get all the household chores done."

NOT:  "Do NOT buy that boat, I forbid it!"[/quote]

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