Reply to Would you look the other way on cheating if everything else was perfect?

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Reply to "Would you look the other way on cheating if everything else was perfect?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No, it means the emotional bond is broken.[/quote]

I'm not sure about that. My long-term AP has a fairly good partnership with his wife. They coparent ok, have an active social life, and seem fairly committed.

I think they fought more before this affair; his resentment at a life sentence of sexlessness as the cost of being with his kid was putting an edge on him (we were close friends before the affair).

Fast forward a couple of years into our relationship, we love each other and have an emotional connection we both value but I don't think he *doesn't* have one with her. On the one hand, I think more than sex was missing from their marriage or he and I would only be having casual sex- he wouldn't have fallen for me so completely. But on the other, here we are.

My emotional connection with my husband was gone long before the affair. I'm sure I couldn't have fallen for someone else if our marriage wasn't irretrievably broken. We're still together though.  His mental illness makes him a great candidate for spousal support. I'm not willing to impoverish myself and our kids so here we are. [/quote]

So you are divorcing your husband and look forward to collecting spousal support?  Your AP should of divorced his wife a long time ago but instead is having an affair with you.  As to the emotional connection with your DH, why did you stay with him.  You keep advocating that it is ok to have an affair and kids are involved.  How old are you kids? 
Is your AP going to divorce his DW so you guys can be together?[/quote].

No, I said I would probably owe spousal support because my husband is mentally ill and can't support himself.

I think my AP and his wife have an emotional connection. It's mostly platonic and companionate. And since he has a great sex life and romantic love with me is say his life is pretty complete.

So I'll keep pulling my weight as bread winner at home, keep my kids in a place where they can enjoy their dad (he can't stay  employed but he's kind and helps with homework), and have an unconventional emotional life.

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