Reply to My mom laughed when I told her my son choked at daycare

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, here. I guess I feel the need to defend myself a bit here. My son’s been having issues with feeding - gagging, choking, hard swallows, coughing - for the past 8 months (as in, when he started solids). The daycare has catered meals; he already had a designated lunch buddy (an adult who sits with him while he eats) and had been getting food that is chopped in smaller pieces than his same-age peers. So after he got a piece of pear the size of a Cheerio lodged in his throat, his pediatrician suggested he get a feeding evaluation done. A SLP with extra training in feeding issues (swallowing, chewing, moving the tongue) does the evaluation. It turned out his mouth skills are fine, but I don’t think I overreacted by taking this seriously.

As a side note, I got married and had him in my late thirties. It’s looking like we won’t be able to have another child. And I think that pain, in combination with “trying to keep a toddler alive” is making me more sensitive.

On the other hand, my parents have a history of invalidating and minimizing my feelings and experiences. This interaction just felt different because they were minimizing what happened to my child.[/quote]

OP, my child has disabilities and I had to leave a career I loved to care for him. I told my mom and she said “Wow, you’ve really become a kept woman haven’t you!” She thought she was very clever, but she is just a strange person who has terrible social skills. I decided then I was done doing 80% of the work in our relationship and making excuses for her. I just don’t talk to her as much anymore, respond to emails more slowly, space out her visits for months longer than she wants. It’s much better this way. So my advice is to divest from this relation that you know is not positive for you.[/quote]

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