Reply to Custody Issue - Pendente Lite VS. Divorce Decree

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your earlier thread about the house sharing situation implied that you were the one initiating the divorce, but here you say she's the one who initiated a fault-based divorce due to adultery? What's going on here?[/quote]

I initiated the divorce and we agreed to keep it out of court. She said she wanted me to take the lead on everything since I was the one wanting the divorce. She wanted me to draft the separation agreement and file the necessary papers. I don't think she realized that I was serious about moving forward with the divorce.

Once DW realized that things were serious and we really were moving towards divorce she became extremely manipulative and began alienating me from my daughter. DW lied and went back on everything that we had agreed upon. She lawyered up thereby forcing me to lawyer up.

We were on track for a no fault divorce after the year separation period. After months of going back and forth between the lawyers and not getting anywhere she and her lawyer filed for an at fault divorce and pendent lite hearing.

She told her lawyer so many lies at every turn. If you have never dealt with a narcissist before you are very lucky. The lies and manipulation and emotional abuse are enough to make you question your sanity. [/quote]

What jurisdiction are you in? In most places you can't file for a fault-based divorce on the grounds of adultery without independent corroboration of the adultery (e.g., emails between you and the AP).[/quote]

Also very strange if they have already been separated for a year or close to a year. Really the only reason you would do this, practically, would be to waive the waiting period. I can’t see what OP’s ex is gaining from this - but I also can’t tell if OP is only giving selective facts because so much doesn’t add up. [/quote]

The practical reason is because in VA, where OP is (PW County), adultery is a bar to spousal support.  The other at fault grounds may reduce Ex's liability for spousal support to OP so it may make sense especially since spousal support is no longer going to be taxable income to the recipient per the new tax law after this year.[/quote]

Normally working adults making $90k per year wouldn’t be entitled to spousal support (only child support) but I suppose anything is possible. OP seems to be implying his ex lied about the fault grounds but it’s hard to tell. [/quote]

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