Reply to Long-term relationship with a guy with 15 years of alimony payments

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would treat it like any other long-term debt, like a student loan or medical bills.[/quote]

Same.[/quote]

I agree it's a debt, but it is different because it's going to another woman.  Life with people who are divorced with kids can be complicated, so don't kid yourself about that.[/quote]

It’s a debt that he must pay. Accept it and move forward with him or move on to someone else.

If you try to get him to go to court and restructure his agreement it will cause issues with his ex AND his children. It sounds like the situation with his first family is stable, don’t underestimate how much damage you will do to his relationship with his children if you push this and you end up being successful or if you just succeed in raking up lots of legal bills. Maybe he’ll be okay with you destroying his relationship with his kids - at least at first. But eventually, the novelty will wear off and you’ll be on your way to being wife#2 and he’ll be looking for a wife #3 who doesn’t demand a pound of flesh as a condition for a relationship.

If you can’t deal with his financial obligations. Move on. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, it just means you shouldn’t be dating divorced men. [/quote]

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