Reply to How much free time is reasonable per day in this situation?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've read the OP and posts and I've interpreted this to be:

DH wants kid free time when home - 2 hours.

I'm with OP - not sure where all the "outsourcing" comments are coming in because OP is not complaining that she doesn't have free time. She's not complaining about the division of chores. She's not complaining about work schedule. She's saying - DH wants to come home, not interact with kid because he comes home late and wants to chill for 2 hours - and then DC goes to bed.

OP, basically your husband doesn't want to play with the kid everyday. Doesn't want to be involved in the evening activities. He wants to come home and veg on top of his already scheduled "free time activities" such as working out/hobby/gardening. So basically, he doesn't want a family - except for a few hours on the weekend.

So - DC will be impacted. This is OPs problem. In giving DH what he's asking for, he basically won't interact with his child during the week. And I like OP thinks this is hurtful to DC.

That said, I'd try to meet in the middle. Get a Saturday babysitter on DH free weekend. Tell him he can have every Saturday (full day) to do whatever the hell he wants kid and wife free. During the week - give DH an hour by himself to decompress if your house allows it. Let him do usual greetings and agree that he can go to the study/den for an hour while you and DC do dinner or whatever. DH then can spend hour with child before bedtime. I'd extend preschool to all day instead of part time to allow you to do things that perhaps you're doing in the evening (laundry cooking or whatever) so you're free to chill with DC when he gets home and not worry about those things. That's about the best plan I can come up with that allows for him to have more free time. Will this impact DC? Most certainly. Can you force DH to be a better and more engaged father on a daily basis and not resent it? No. Hopefully he'll wake up and realize but unless this is a dealbreaker, you'll need to manage it as best you can.[/quote]

+1[/quote]

+2.  It sucks for your son, but try not to add to it by making dad seem like the bad guy (even if he is).  You can force a person to bean involved parent.

Also, +1 for 12:16-

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