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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I don't have any answers for you. But I did want to say that some kids are so easy - I have two like that. Everything that others mentioned would work but likely wouldn't be necessary. And I have a third one that is sometimes like yours. To complicate things, my son has mental health issues and it's often hard to tease out what is mental illness and what is asshole teenage behavior. Regardless none of the things people mentioned would work and if I push too far, he'd just leave or do something stupid like try to kill himself. I could never take his phone because sometimes that's the only way I can track him.

With him, we manage by reducing the expectations. I would never have asked mine to clean up his mess because I knew I could t enforce it. I only ask/require things I know I can make happen so I don't lose credibility. I also have my son in therapy and receiving medical care. His doctors and therapists have no other suggestions.

BTW, my sons mental illness only started to show up around age 15. [/quote]

+1
My best advice is to not take advice from people who don’t really  understand what you’re dealing with.  BTDT - their advice is often exactly the opposite of what you need to be doing. Read about ODD and get him into therapy ASAP. You can sell it as “working on your relationship”  or mandatory to keep the phone. Get support for you too from someone who can coach you on the special parenting skills these kids require. [/quote]

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