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[quote=Anonymous]I wouldn't have sex with a guy just because you think it will keep him around. That's like buying a house in the city when you would really prefer living in the country and then hoping the city just goes away because you bought a house there.  I truly believe that some men use online dating as a means to get sex, the "dating" is just a polite way to get there. These are probably the same men who would be sleeping with the secretaries (think Mad Men) or visiting the cat houses if those were regarded as viable options. 
If I were you op, I'd only date men who had time to actually spend time with you. No random "I'm going out of town and don't know when I'll be back" no, "I can only see you for lunch" no "quick coffee or drink" dates. Anybody can get out of the house for those events and they are low investment. The dates don't have to be expensive, but they do need to be where the two of you can talk. If you aren't sure what to talk about, I would suggest you read books about whatever interests you. Try starting a conversation about the books and see where it goes. If he can't muster any interest or direct the topic to someplace else, that's a bad sign. Pay attention to what they say and decide if their responses are those of someone you'd like to see again. For example, if you like baseball, you probably don't want to date someone who thinks that sports is a waste of money. They don't have to love sports, but you don't want to be with someone who pees all over it when you say "Wow, wasn't that pitch incredible!"  
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