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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If my wife of 18 years recoils from my touch (hand on back and the like), considers 2x a month having plenty of sex, and makes excuses, is the marriage over?[/quote]

It's slightly less over than mine... I'm not even getting 2x a month.

I almost feel like I could live with that. But nah, it's over.[/quote]

Just don't [i]expect [/i]it to get better. Honestly, I felt the same way for a long time. LONG time. Actually, we have gotten better but it has been very difficult.[/quote]

10 second fix to your sexless marriage, 100% guaranteed success: walk into the kitchen and announce "Honey, I've decided to stop pretending that you want a sexual relationship with me. From now on, I consider our marriage to be consensual non-monogamous"
[/quote]

This would absolutely not work for many people. 
Personally, I would say ok (woman here).

If I said it, the next thing my husband would do is walk out the door and go to a divorce attorney.

It would not fix a marriage...it would end it. Terrible advice.

[b]Marriage is way more than sex.[/b] [/quote]

True, but it's the keystone in the arch. Remove it, and all the "other stuff" is inevitably going to collapse.[/quote]

Sorry, I disagree. It was like that with past boyfriends, which seems really shallow. I take the long view of marriage. I don’t rate sex as high enough to be “the keystone of the arch.” Part of the arch maybe, but not the key thing. That was the problem with every relationship I had before marriage. And obviously, I did marry those guys. Sex was rated so highly it trumped other things. [/quote]

If you DH genuinely agrees that sex is not critically important, then I guess you're good. But I doubt it.[/quote]

Any partner who believes that sex is not critically important has no right to complain when their spouse goes and does that unimportant thing with somebody else.[/quote]

This is such BS.  If you've tried to discuss with your spouse and no effort is being made AND you're honest about your extra-marital affair, sure, you may have a point.  But cheating is still cheating b/c it's dishonest.  If you're doing it behind his/her back, it's dishonest AND you're a coward.

I also agree iwth the person who said sex is important but far less important than other things. Have you ever stayed in a relationship for the sex? I have and while it was great for awhile, it was not more important than the other factors leading to failure of the relationship. [/quote]

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