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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think for some couples the desire remains fairly constant, with a dry spell here and there. They've won the marriage lottery, though, because I think for the vast majority, sex becomes just another part of the "hard work" that is marriage. [b]You have sex because sex feels good, and you want to have sex, and this is the person you agreed to have sex with until one of you dies. [/b]Or you have sex because you love your partner, not because you desire them, but you want to keep them happy, or you're afraid they'll leave or find it elsewhere.

That's why it dies. Because it becomes work, and eventually no amount of date nights and "choosing each other" can bring it back to life. So you end up with either a fully dead bedroom, or an undead one where you have a kind of zombie sex that's just going through the motions.[/quote]

This. This is real.

We're not having "zombie sex" but it's totally routine, if satisfying.

I can't see how that isn't inevitable to some degree though. I've been sleeping with this man for TWENTY years. There is no more novelty, mystery, tension, etc. in our relationship.[/quote]

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