Reply to ONS had a child - How screwed am I?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]I'm trying to understand all of the issues as best I can which is why I posted. It's a major decision and I'm certainly not going to make a decision one way or the other within a day but I'd like to gather as much information as possible before doing so. I'm not convinced on the "I'll regret it" point yet so I'm probing further.

The truth is many don't regret it. My friend was pregnant by her bf who went on to get married having his own kids. Was never interested in their child that she raised. Same with his wife. The son tracked him down when he was 30 something which I thought was a bad idea. The guy told him the man that raised him was his father, and basically he wanted to be left alone.

OP I would weigh everything carefully. If you truly have no desire or to change your lifestyle I think that's your answer. I would say either be an involved father or totally let it go.[/quote]

I agree. I am also leaning towards the idea that the child may be better off without you.  Children need consistency.  If you don't believe you can be a consistent presence in the child's life whether that's every week, every month or every quarter.  Don't make any effort other than sending the money.

Just curious.  How old is the child and have you informed your family you have a child?[/quote]

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