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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I could forgive infidelity but not another baby.  That's just me, and no judgment if you can forgive.[/quote]

Not sure what the difference is. Either way obviously it wasn't one time he was cheating. If she didn't get pregnant the wife may never have found out. At least this way he is caught and she can move on with her life. Never finding out and being in a phony marriage is beyond sad imo. At least knowing she can weigh it all and make a choice. [/quote]

I'm not the PP you're responding to, but I imagine the difference is a permanent, recurring reminder of the cheating.  I don't know if I could forgive infidelity at all, but I know myself well enough to know I couldn't if I was reminded of it every time CS came out of the account, every time the kid came over for the weekend, every birthday, etc.[/quote]

Exactly, this.

I am a realist when it comes to lifetime monogamy.  Good in theory, but humans are terrible at it.  If we all had windows into our spouses private lives and divorced automatically for infidelity, the marriage rate would be close to zero.  It's no surprise to me that people want to have sex outside marriage, and that they act on it.  Who isn't tempted?

It's not only the recurring payments, but the OW is going to be a part of my life forever now.  As will the kid.  And my DH was dumb enough to have unprotected sex to completion?  No thanks, she can have him.[/quote]

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