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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's a son problem. My son called to tell me he didn't let his wife know that I was coming. He just wants me to let it go and says it will all smooth over.[/quote]

Is this OP?[/quote]

Yes. Apparently, my son forgot to book their family vacation and was trying to use this as a way to smooth things over with DIL. He was just going to spring me on her assuming she wouldn't say anything. Im certainly disappointed.[/quote]

Huh?? Now you sound like a troll, for sure. Gimme a break.[/quote]

NP here. Stop calling troll. The adult son is a wimp who didn't tell his wife something he feared she might not like and then expected her to suck it up when he sprung it on her. HE is responsible for its being a surprise, not MIL, because MIL thought DIL knew the whole deal. The mess is son's fault for not being able to talk to his wife, who sounds like a drama queen if she really said for MIL not to contact them for six months just because MIL gave her family a huge, expensive gift.

MIL did consult. MIL did tell son in advance that she would come as well. That is not crossing boundaries because son did not tell her that at the time but said yes to the gift he knew was coming, but didn't say when they initially discussed it, "Don't come, mom. Boundaries!" All the boundaries talk on here, when you know the details about how MIL was up front from the start with son, is silly. It's son who wasn't up front with his wife. [b]Maybe MIL knows that if she talks directly to DIL about these things -- even something as good as this gift -- she'll get blasted as somehow in the wrong.[/b]

MIL told son and assumed he would fill in his wife on the details. He didn't. Maybe MIL shouldn't have made that assumption, sure, but apparently she was giving their ENTIRE family a huge, expensive gift and was clear with son that she would come as well, and he is too big a wuss to tell his wife the whole deal, and wife is too big a drama queen to say thank you and deal so the kids can enjoy themselves.

The stuff about the ex-DIL and MIL's relationship with her is not relevant. MIL didn't say she is best buddies with her ex-DIL. She's been clear that her house is the drop-off point for her grandson and she must see ex-DIL there when the boy gets picked up. What's MIL supposed to do, be a cold witch to ex-DIL whenever there's a pickup and they cross paths? What good would that do anyone, especially the grandson?

Before the usual DCUM snark starts up, no, I am not MIL posting again. I'm just seeing such mean-spirited posts assuming that MIL is obviously in the wrong, no matter what additional details she tries to provide, because there's always so much hate for all MILs on DCUM. And no, I'm not an MIL at all myself. I'm a DIL who knows when to act civilized and accept a gift like a grown-up.

[/quote]

So the idea is that MIL asked DS because she knew that DIL would in no way want to take a week-long trip with her?  How is that in any way acceptable behavior?  MIL, DIL doesn't like you and doesn't want to take a trip with you.  Let it go. [/quote]

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