Reply to Making time for kids? Study says quality trumps quantity

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've been both: WOHM and SAHM. I'm incredibly fortunate to have a Mom who insisted in keeping her grandchildren when I did work.

Leaving my infant with a stranger does not sit well with me. When you add in a day care center where they won't receive individual care and attention...it's not happening. And having a nanny just leaves too much unaccountability  for behaving well towards my child. I'd rather go on welfare and/or move in with my parents than subject my child to that.

IMO, children should be with their parents and/or loving grandparents until preschool. 
[/quote]

It depends on the family member.  My MIL is retired and kept my nephew.  It set him behind socially a lot because all she did was stick him front of the tv.  He knew all of the story lines on general hospital and one life to live.  At the time people thought it was funny, but now he is behind in elementary school.

A lot of kids go to daycare and learn to read, write, and do all kinds of things that put them ahead.  My daughter was really in love with her daycare teacher.  When we moved she cried over her for days.

The fact that you are okay with fleecing the government for welfare shows you have low moral character.  [/quote]

I would say that might be more reflective of your child.

My Mom did no activities with my kids, they watched plenty of TV and they were never behind in school. But...my emphasis was on INFANT care, not preschool.

And if the choice is between putting my young infant in a center for 8+ hours a day and welfare, [b]I'd absolutely choose welfare.[/b][/quote]

But that's not a valid choice. Welfare does not pay the bills - you clearly have no understanding of how very little one actually gets - and it would not pay for you to stay home. You would have to feed your kids subpar food and they would not be able to live in a safe comfortable home. You are grossly underestimating and misunderstanding what it actually means to be poor. The government is not interested in funding your ideals. And numerous studies have shown that poverty in early childhood is linked to just about every societal ill. So, really, that is your choice? You would teach your children - hopefully not a girl, my goodness - that if the choice were working and figuring out child care for 40 hours a week or abject poverty, out of which it is almost impossible to overcome, you choose to be poor. I am not sure anyone would ever applaud that reasoning. [/quote]

Oh, how wrong you are. Born and raised in poverty, public housing and welfare.

Thankfully, this was not a choice I had to make. And neither do you all. Surviving on one spouse's income is entirely doable. Entirely. [/quote]

I know LOTs of people that live on welfare.  A life on welfare is shameful.  It's sad for the kids and adults.  People that live on welfare in the DC area live in some very bad and dangerous areas.  Most rental homes in nice areas will not accept section 8 tenants.  Welfare pays peanuts here compared to the cost of living.  I'm sorry but living on welfare should not be an option to stay at home.  It's setting a poor example for your child.  It's also not the taxpayers job to fund you because you couldn't keep your legs closed. [/quote]

Get off the welfare kick, as that's obviously not the best choice. Getting by on one spouse's income IS possible. Why do you ignore this?[/quote]

And why do you ignore that it's not that simple?  Whether you can get by on one salary depends on a lot of things- the size of the salary itself, your family's obligations and expenses, when you bought a house in the DC area, etc.  And no, some of us aren't willing to make the sacrifices required to just "get by."  Some of us feel it is important to prepare for the future and not live paycheck to paycheck.

Are you the one that is living off the one income of $60k?  How low are you willing to go exactly, to be a SAHM?  What if your spouse gets laid off, has to take a pay cut, etc.? $40k, $20k?[/quote]

The Lord will provide. He always does! [/quote]

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