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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Did you guys see the post about her missing Brandon/life with Brandon? Seems so random to post that.[/quote]

Missed it! What did she say?[/quote]

"When you are recovering, new things present themselves to grieve or process or deal with constantly. Maybe you didn't think of it sooner, maybe you hadn't faced it yet, maybe the thing just knew you finally had the emotional bandwidth to go one layer deeper so it rose up. 
I have twelve gorgeous 100-year-old pecan trees. They are majestic. I had them all trimmed last week to restore their perfect canopy and give them their next 100 years. I watched through the windows and from the porch all day long, because I am OBSESSED with the before-and-after of tree trimming. 
And the thought that wouldn't leave my mind was this: "The only person that knows how much I love tree trimming is Brandon."
It has stayed with me for over a week now. After 26 years of marriage having literally grown up together, he is the keeper of a million little things about me:
How the backs of my hands prickle when I get an adrenaline surge. How I giggle uncontrollably when I am nervous. How I weirdly get goosebumps when I'm too hot. How I love open blinds. My devotion to 90's country, women specifically, Trisha Yearwood especially. How I don't like people to watch me cry during a movie. How I have a telepathic gift to find an obscure lost object by using my weird brain power. How I cannot deal with scary movies. How I like my coffee with horrible Almond Joy Creamer. 
So I find myself asking: "Who will know me like this?" 
How can you recreate a lifetime of knowing someone and being known? It all feels lost to the abyss, or at any rate, so much to start over with. No one new can ever know all my memories, all my experiences, all the everything...and I can never know theirs. 
Starting with someone halfway through your life holds the possibility of doing it all better, wiser, more grounded and true, but it is also sad, because the first half will always just be a retelling, and some of it will be lost. Someone will have to ask how you take your coffee, and that seems like an absurd thing to have to explain at 47. 
Second Chancers, how did you navigate this? Did you ever feel like no one could ever know you as well? Did you worry that the missing first half would be insurmountable?"[/quote]
I actually think that’s quite nice and real[/quote]

I do too...I think this deeper, sadder recognition often comes later, these are some of the painful emotional losses that come with ending a long term marriage obviously. And it is deeply sad (and if her ex has any heart at all  i would imagine he has these moments too). I give her kudos for being able to both feel it and write about it. It suggests she may have more depth and maturity than we give her credit for.[/q

I thought this was sad and true and brave of her. I'm not always a super fan but this seemed really real to me. [/quote]

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