Reply to Sahms - what's your schedule during the week?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a SAHM now and I have never trusted anyone except my DH and my mom to look after my children.  Especially when I was a WOHM.   What does it tell you?  Nothing, except I found it difficult to trust people with childcare.

Now I am a SAHM with two out of the nest and one in HS. I have a cleaning lady, twice a week as well as a lawn maintainence person.  I have had them since before my kids were born - so more than 20 years.  They have been with us when I was having my babies and when I was WOH. I realized very early that instead of paying for therapy, I can pay for the cleaning person and I will be much happier in life. We are middle class for DC, and I am happy that I have good help and I have managed to retain them with excellent pay.

Having a babysitter, a nanny, a chauffeur, a cook, a personal trainer, a maid is nothing to be defensive about - regardless of if you are a SAHM or a WOHM.  You are actually helping the economy and you obviously have the money to afford this.   What is bad is not paying these people fair wages or treating them with disrespect.  (This also applies to people who do not pay contractors).

I love the luxury and peace of mind of having a domestic staff.  An absolutely clean and well maintained house is my thing and priority.  Some people like to spend their money on vacations and going out to eat or on spas.  I on the other hand like to have a well organized and clean house and yard.  DH and I host often, we have a thriving social life, my HS has friends over for projects and such. All this is possible for me only because I have help.

I am not a superwoman. Being the super-mom is tiring and fruitless.  I am however able to have a clean house, relaxed and peaceful atmosphere at home, no fights within the family, no resentments, ability of the family members to have hobbies, friends, or socialize - because someone else  helps me out.  I am grateful that I have that luxury.  My cleaning lady does more for the happiness of my entire family and frees us up to do the things we want to do, than any other relative or friend.   She is appreciated and she is rewarded.

If my post makes anyone go ballistic - oh well!

[/quote]

It doesn't make me ballistic but I can't imagine being a SAHM with a cleaning lady if I were middle class as you say.  I sure hope you have a private retirement account.  [/quote]

LOL. I do have my own retirement account.
I am very comfortable because we have always lived below our means. When our peers were buying in Bethesda, Arlington, Potomac and Chevy Chase - we chose to live in a cheaper area.   I am glad that my DH did not care about where we lived.

I also saved all my earnings and made it grow.  I would not buy a designer bag or shoes (strictly Macy's and Kohls shopper), but I will pay for a cleaning lady.  [b] I am not middle class.  I am DC middle class.[/b]  Which is a whole different story.  People's idea of wealth has changed here because they are so much in debt or have high mortgages or students loans or cost of Private schools,  that they do not understand that a HHI of 200 - 300K  is a huge amount of money everywhere else in the US.

What does a DC middle class HHI gets you in the suburbs - especially if your mortgage is low, retirement and college is taken care of, no student debt, no childcare cost, no private school cost and no botox ?  A very relaxed life with drudge chores outsourced.  I pay around 9K a year for my entire house cleaning and entire yard work.  That is just 2 designer handbags for some, or a trip or two to the beach. I don't have the handbags and I don't like the beach.

[/quote]

We are the same way.  My DH stays at home with the kids, and we pay for a housekeeper 4 days a week and lawn care.  I make about $230k/yr.  I figure it's about [b]what some people spend on luxury cars, expensive furniture, or vacations.  [/b]We are very happy spending our money this way.[/quote]

I'd prefer to spend on luxury cars, furniture or vacations.  Why?  I can't build my own luxury car or furniture or go on vacation for free.  However, I can clean my own house.  [/quote]

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