Reply to SIL getting remarried but no humility re 2nd wedding

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[quote=Anonymous]I got married at the age of 29 to a guy who had had a brief starter marriage in his early 20's.  I remember feeling really guilty that I was putting his family through the whole wedding thing again, but on the other hand, I had been fantasizing about my wedding and my wedding dress since I was five.  I had also made some pretty serious career sacrifices (quitting on overseas assignment that would have put me on fast track, etc. in order to live in US with spouse) to make the marriage work.  I also have parents who wanted to throw a nice wedding for their daughter, grandparents and elderly relatives who were looking forward to coming to the wedding, siblings that wanted to be in a wedding, etc.  I had a couple of friends who actually wanted to be bridesmaids.

I remember at first saying I wanted nothing, no gifts, just contributions to a charity, etc.  but I was basically talked into having a big wedding with bridesmaids, etc.  I also thought, for some reason, that 29 was too old for a big party and that they were for younger people.  On some level, I did feel like people expected me to be ashamed that I was marrying a divorced guy and I was almost 30. (Parts of my family are pretty working class so I had cousins that had already been married for ten years, had three kids, etc.  even though they were my age).

In retrospect, I am really glad I did the big wedding.  His family was wealthy so it's not like they couldn't afford the wedding gifts, etc.  and I think sometimes when you're going through rough times, it's nice to think about the wedding and the good times, the way you once worshipped each other.  It hurts to think that there may have been people at my wedding judging me as doing something inappropriate by wearing a wedding dress, walking down an aisle, etc.[/quote]

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