Reply to To those who struggled to send their kids to a Big 3-like school

Forum Index » Private & Independent Schools

Reply to "To those who struggled to send their kids to a Big 3-like school - did it turn out to be "worth it.""

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Having just cut a check for my rising second grader's very expensive Big-3 private school, and looking at our overall finances knowing how close we are cutting it financially, I would love to hear from parents who made it all the way through to graduation, and looking back thought it worth the "investment," notwithstanding all the related pain and suffering making ends meet.  I am most interested in hearing from those similarly situated - i.e., barely making tuition payments, not being able to save for college, and making all other conceivable sacrifices.  Yes, I am looking for inspiring stories, but I suppose if you have something at the other end of the spectrum, I might as well hear that too.

Thank you for listening and, I hope, responding.[/quote]

Maybe it's a good time to step back and re-read the original post (quoted above).

I feel for OP.  She wasn't in a decision-making position (already cut the check) -- just looking for some support.

We're not struggling financially with tuition and, honestly, I don't know what choice we'd make if we were.

But here's why lower school has felt worth it to me -- my kid has learned more and seemingly effortlessly than I ever learned from school at her age.  I think most kids start out scientists (the early years of child development look like an endless series of experiments whose goal is to deduce rules from recurring patterns!), but most lose that interest with schooling, in part from being steered toward skills acquisition in math and reading during those early years.  My kid hasn't.  Science multiple times a week since PreK has not only kept her interest alive, it's fostered an analytic bent that shapes her thinking in other realms.  Scientific method at an early age is good for you -- even if you don't end up a scientist, LOL!  She also loves languages -- not just her native one.  And she sees herself as a writer (and a maker, a doer, a creator) rather than as smart/a quick study/a good student.  She also tends to see herself as her own agenda-setter (not always fun from a parental perspective, I admit, but a quality that I admire and that will serve her well down the line.)

Would her math and reading scores be just as good if she had gone to public schools?  No doubt.  Would going to public school hurt her chances of admission to a great college?  No -- in fact, in her case, it might well enhance them.  So if the question is "Do/did I need to invest $30,000 starting from PreK to maximize my DC's test scores and prospects for college admission?"  The answer is no -- in that sense the "investment" isn't "worth it."

But those aren't the dividends, so to speak, I was hoping to reap.  I'm getting what I paid for -- which is a kid with a much broader and deeper exposure from a much earlier age to a variety of kinds of knowledge than I had; a kid who naturally feels competent/capable of mastery but whose assessments of whether something is done well aren't generally shaped  (limited?) by her classmates' performance or her teacher's reaction.   A kid who is articulate and comfortable with adults and whose mode of interaction tends to be to contribute rather than to show off or to opt out.  These are all qualities I've seen nurtured, valued, and modeled at her school.  And which I see as relatively rare in our culture.

I'm not saying every private school (and no public school) gives you these things.  Nor am I saying that every kid at this particular private school takes away from it what my kid has.  Or that this is what other parents want or should want or expect to get from  their schools.

Bottom line:  to figure out whether it's "worth it" to you, start by looking at your DC -- is s/he happy?  turning out to be the kind of person you'd hoped?  If so, to what extent do you think that the school has contributed to that outcome?  What did you want/expect from the school?  Are you getting it?  Does it support the things you value (and struggle to achieve)?  Does it throw different things into the mix than you would have but that you appreciate?  If so, could you say the same thing about your local public?

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics