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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
    Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
        OP here. I really don't think he's having an affair. I have access to all of his email accounts, he doesn't keep his phone locked, and he's accountable for his time (he's only really gone for work). I think it is depression and a mid-life crisis.

In some ways, I actually HOPE it is an affair - because that would make it easier for me to accept and move on. If he's intentionally deciding to leave us, that's one thing. It is harder to accept when I think he's going through some sort of mental health crisis.

You said earlier in the thread that he had an emotional affair, if not more, with a subordinate. He probably took their conversation to an email account that you do not know about, and they are probably carrying on only during work hours, for now.

Possible, but does it really matter at this point? He's not on the same page as OP. He is not committed to the marriage. He is waffling, and playing games.

In or out, buddy. If you're not all in, get out. Why is irrelevant. [/quote]

Yeah, this is kind of where I'm at.  Yes, it is possible that they are still carrying on at work, or on some e-mail account I'm unaware of.  I can't control that.  At this point it doesn't even really matter to me WHY this is happening.  The man I married would not have done this, would not behave this way.  I don't know this person.  I definitely don't want this person around my children.  I only wish in VA that being a selfish asshole could constitute grounds to fight for full custody.  As it is, we'll do shared custody.  Which is again, unfair to the kids to hvae to be moving back and forth between two homes.  [/quote]

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