Reply to Help me navigate this childcare situation with my husband

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I am completely blocking out any notion of divorce, until the youngest is in elementary school.  When I said I am worried about what will happen once the kids leave, I meant once they leave permanently as in college. I will still be in fairly young, in my early 40s. So i am mostly worried about him sleeping constantly, and me doing what?  the kids will gone and I will be left to take care of him. He is a total man child, this is a lesson to your daughters, do not marry your first boyfriend and do no marry young. [/quote]

OP, I sympathize with your situation. I will point out that you do not have a ton of options. You will probably have to either a) do all the work, as you have been doing, and recognize that nothing will change, b) demand change, as frequently as necessary, and recognize that this will create tension between you and your husband, or c) hire someone to do morning drop off for you so that you can get to work and your husband can be his lazy self.

I think there are pros and cons to each options. If you just suck it up, you may (will) become (stay) resentful and will be stressed out and exhausted all the time. However, if you set your expectations to that level, you are unlikely to be disappointed. If you nag your husband, he will be mad at you, you will be mad at him, and your kids will probably pick up on what's going on. His behavior may or may not change. If you hire someone, it can get expensive, but you know that you have someone reliable helping you out.[/quote]

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