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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She's very into the idea that this baby will look like her. I look like her, and this baby is a girl, and she's excited about having another clone. This would be her only genetic grandchild (the rest are step -- I am her biological daughter) and she's excited about that.

I don't actually mind if what I say in fact answers the question -- I don't want to talk about it or deal with her feelings on the matter right now. I will honestly be a little angry if she cares so much what this baby looks like rather than just being super happy for me that I'm finally getting a baby. But I know it's reasonable for her to have her own feelings about it. I'm just not ready to deal with that yet.[/quote]

It is very likely that if you had a child with your own eggs, the child would still look nothing like you. I'm saying this not for your mother's benefit but for your benefit. I'm guessing some of your sadness relates to this issue too. (Maybe you are even projecting this specific concern onto her?)

For what it's worth...I have twins thanks to IVF. Prior to starting fertility treatments, I thought I'd never go that far (hoped to get pregnant with Clomid, etc.) and certainly didn't think I'd consider donor eggs. However, now I know that I'd probably do whatever was needed to build a family. And quite frequently I look at my OE twins and think, WHERE did these two come from? Even though you can see my husband's and my own family traits here and there ... kids are so uniquely themselves that all the stuff I assumed was important about genes etc. seem so much less so now.

Your daughter will be your daughter truly and fully. And she will be her own person entirely too. And that would be the case your eggs or borrowed ones.[/quote]

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