Reply to Was your mother a "yeller," how did it affect you?

Forum Index » Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers

Reply to "Was your mother a "yeller," how did it affect you? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]My mom was a constant, angry yeller. We were not bad kids, either, at least I don't think so. She did not have and still does not have much insight about being that way or the stress it caused everyone, as far as I can tell.

I was often in a state of tension and/or anger as a result, especially as a teen. I hated her. My reaction was to internalize all my feelings about it, to simmer, pout, etc.  Our relationship improved markedly when I moved away for college, though I still keep her at arm’s length, emotionally (I don't think she realizes this), and have trouble respecting her in many ways.

Whether by design or nature, I am pretty flat emotionally with the unfortunate exception of random, weeks long episodes of crippling anxiety that are so bad I am usually borderline suicidal during them. They pop up seemingly at random (do not correlate to any actual stressful events in my life, of which there are plenty) every couple of years starting in my mid twenties. Eventually they subside with lots of medication, and I am totally fine for the years between. I have developed a theory that these episodes might be repercussions of years of stress and tension from the yelling, that I just kept bottling and bottling. Maybe these episodes are eruptions of all that tension, or some kind of PTSD?

Anyway, and take this with a grain of salt because I only have one toddler, but my parenting style is a direct, conscious reaction to my upbringing. I rarely yell, especially in anger, mostly only to communicate urgency/danger. I do speak calmly and sternly if needed for disciplinary purposes. I really don’t want to do to my family what my mom did to me and my sibling.
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics