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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "S/o SAHMs - why do so many men want one?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wish my wife would go back to work. 2 401ks at the least would make an enormous impact on retirement.[/quote] Who would have raised your children before they were old enough for school? Daycare? (Perhaps you missed the thread about "The Hell of American Daycare"?) A sitter off the street? Who? You? You had best kiss your wife's feet for doing the work that few people actually *want* to do. And before you make any assumptions about me, I'm a single mother.[/quote] We raised our kids you ding bat.[/quote] Don't call her that. Her question is a valid one. She's pointing out the very real dilemma of working and parenting; that if your wife had always worked, you'd need daycare. If she never WOH, yes, you only get one 401K. And if wife returned to work now, which many women do and is reasonable, she is entering the workforce at a severe disadvantage. Again, that doesn't make it unreasonable. But ask yourself if you'd want to do the jobs she's now qualified to do being out of the workforce for, let me guess; 5-7 years? (think retail, clerical, food service). The point is, you got a good deal when the kids are little. And lots of WOH spouses want it both ways: SAH spouse when kids are little, WOH spouse when they're big. Why not? No deal benefits YOU better. Unsurprisingly, the spouse on the other end of that deal may not agree, as it sounds like your wife does not. You're not alone...this is a dilemma many of us face. But the fact that you can't answer PP's question without name calling speaks volumes. [/quote]
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