Reply to An immigrants musings on the SAHM vs working mom debate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.

I am still confused about how the ability to work outside the home and earn an income started being viewed as a chore and a burden rather than a desirable exercise of ones ability be able to use your mind and intelligence and be financially independent?

All I knew was women wanting to be more than just housewives and poop cleaners for their babies.

In the first world, its reversed. Women seem to want to go back into their kitchens.
[/quote]

It becomes a chore and a burden when it is no longer a choice or option.  Duh.

That's why the privilege is having a choice- The privilege is not working and it's not staying at home.  It's the choice to do either.  [/quote]

And also the ability to switch back and forth between the options as life and desires change.  The WOHM/SAHM debate is so often framed as if every SAHM will never work again and no WOHM will ever take time off while the reality is much more fluid.  I've done both, most of my SAHM friends from the baby/preschool years are now working at least part time and most full time.  And, now I work FT and my DH is the one with a flexible WAH job.

I was a SAHM for several years and kept a hand in my career via freelance work.  Not because we couldn't afford childcare - my salary was more than enough to cover that with some left over.  Not because DH traveled a lot - he had reasonable hours and rarely traveled.  I stayed home because I WANTED to be the person caring for my babies and DH was happy to have me do that too. And I worked in a field with plenty of freelancing opportunities and had seen several other women on/off ramp in our field so I felt confident I could get back in when I wanted to (which I did).   And I had confidence in the strength of my marriage and the fact that we always operated as financial equals regardless of who made how much money at an particular time.  All of these are great privileges and I wish all families were in the same position.[/quote]

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