Reply to SO angry at my dh this morning

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I guess there are no rentals at all in Old Town Fairfax, Reston, or places that won't give your DH the heebie-jeebies and are acceptably cool for you.

In all seriousness refusing to take Metro is really hobbling you and why is that such a more serious wish/desire than your husband's desire to NOT live in the city, where let's face it, crime is higher and costs higher even if you won't get attacked randomly by MS-13.[/quote]

But even on metro their commutes would be really long...there are many places between where they are and DC.  OP is suggesting they live in one of them, and that seems pretty reasonable to me.  Changing jobs so you can stay in a rental apartment that one member of the ocuple doesn't even like is crazy.[/quote]

But why should her DH move because OP has anxiety issues that don't allow her to commute solo?[/quote]

Um, because they're a team? Because there are other reasons to move closer in? Because the commute makes them both miserable? Because they gave this place a good try and the marriage is suffering? Because each partner's desires should be weighed equally? Because her fear of the Metro is no less irrational than he fear of the city?
[/quote]

Except ... She agreed to move there. Asking someone to uproot IS bigger than not uprooting. And OP isn't just afraid of the metro. She's also afraid to drive alone or any other choices AND she is expecting her husband to suddenly be more social in the city. And it sounds like the commute only makes HER miserable because she insists on waiting hours for her DH to get off (who is probably too tired to socialize if he works that lasts.) she could be going to happy hours like she desperately wants in that time frame - but she isn't. She just waits around for him. Why would it be different if she lived in the city?[/quote]

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