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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I bet, until today, your sister would have said that she would never, ever date a married man, under any circumstances.

I certainly said that until the day I found out that the guy I had fallen in love with was married.

I was reeling - devastated by his dishonestly, devastated that the feelings and hopes I had invested in him were all betrayed, and completely lost and lonely and confused.  I had lost the person who I thought was closest to me.  I had lost the vision of everything that I thought my future might be.

(And yes, we were only together about 5 weeks then.  Cheaters are VERY good at conducting whirlwind, movie-star romances for short periods of time, sweeping women off their feet to escape the mundane, dreary everyday slog of a relationship.)

When he begged to see me to explain why he had lied, everything he said SHOULD have struck me as the bullshit we all know it is.  His wife was emotionally abusive, but he stayed with her because her mom had had a terminal illness, and he didn't want to abandon her.  They had no sex.  They never really had a true connection.  He married too young.  She was an attorney and could be vindictive and controlling, so he needed to wait until he was better situated financially to afford a good lawyer to file for divorce.  Etc etc etc.  I now know it is all BS, but in that first 24-48 hours?  I wanted to believe it all.  I wanted to believe I hadn't just wasted all my time and gotten my heart broken.  I wanted to believe that everything he told me wasn't a complete lie.

It took a few days for me to absorb what a rat he was and tell him never to talk to me again.

My suggestion to you is to have some empathy for your young sister.  She's just been hit with an emotional 2x4.  She's reeling and hurting and grasping at any possibility that her happy ending is still within reach.

I'd suggest just saying something like, "This rat has betrayed you and violated your trust -- you must be devastated.  I'm here for you and I'm so, so sorry you are hurting.  You deserve better.  Please reach out to me if you need me in the next weeks; I know you are hurt and scared and sad."

I would keep the moralizing to yourself unless she asks your opinion. I think you can trust that she will come to understand what a rat he is.  Just give her a little time to absorb the shock of it all.[/quote]
BEST DAMN RESPONSE ON THIS WHOLE THREAD!! I HOPE OP IS LISTENING.[/quote]

+1  [/quote]

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