Reply to When a friend or family member is making a huge parenting mistake...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] My brother and SIL decided to send him to a big, franchised daycare for 8 hours a day at least and fire his nanny "to toughen him up".  I am opposed to everything about this plan but mostly his motivation.  I am a school psychologist and consultant for the top DC private preschools and I know this is a mistake.

I was a jerk to lose it on my SIL when she told me.  Now I do want to talk to my SIL and brother about this calmly.  And we are close - my brother's family and mine - having kids the same age and shuttling between each others houses for holidays and often evening date-night care.

I feel I have to say something.    [/quote]

OMG, are you for real?  You think Daycare is going to ruin your nephew?  How insulting to all the families who use daycare?
I sent my smart, sensitive, newly 2yo to KinderCare after being at home for 2 years.  She thrived!  She loved it.  She only went there for a year before preschool, but she still yells out excitedly "KinderCare" every time we drive by it.  She is now 6. So far, she is my best performing student of my 4 children (the others stayed home with nanny until preschool)

I don't like your brother's idea to "toughen him up", but that isn't what daycare is about.  They can be really good places and open up a whole new world to toddlers.  I don't buy that you are a school psychologist at all.[/quote]

You should apologize for being out of line and then not say anything else.  Don't say "sorry, but I disagree with your decision."  Two years old is a good time to start more interactions with other kids--such as in daycare.  A lot of families send their kids to part-time preschool and have a nanny, but that can get expensive.  If your brother is a jerk to the kid because he thinks he needs to toughen him up, that's one thing, but the daycare providers are not going to turn into drill sergeants to toughen up a 2 year old.  Most daycare providers are used to helping new kids transition into daycare.[/quote]

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