Reply to If you are a woman with kids who divorced at 40+, how are things?

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[quote=Anonymous]I got divorced in my late 30s with a 7 mth old and a 2.5 yr old.  My X was a lovely cheater.  We did 50/50 (virtually impossible to get a judge not to in VA). It killed me at first and I cried when the kids were away.  My 7 mth old was extremely attached to me too. After a few months, when the shock wore off, things slowly got better.  When your marriage is bad, there's a negative undercurrent in the household.  You are probably on eggshells and not enjoying life like you should.  It was hard parenting solo with such small kids, especially overnight if one or both were sick.  As the kids got older and our schedule was stable, things got much better.  My X sees the kids every day during the week and we do every other weekend.

As for myself, I do love having my me time now.  I can get errands done when the kids are with their dad so when they are with me, I can focus more on them.

Personally, I haven't dated at all snd it's been 6 yrs.  I just don't want to be bothered (personal choice).  I'm tired and don't want another human to worry about ;0

You do need to get smart about the pending divorce.  Why are you just waiting or being a sitting duck until he takes action? Get your finances in order, have a consultation with a lawyer so you know what you're entitled to or how things can play out. I felt like I was having an out of body experience when I was in the lawyer's office.  However, it was super empowering to take action during a time when I was mentally and emotionally low.  Good luck![/quote]

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