Reply to DH wants kids and I don't.

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Reply to "DH wants kids and I don't."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]I agree that it matters who changed and why. If you are both solidly sure what you want on the issue, then you need a divorce. You can't have half a baby. If the concern is something that can be worked around (woman not wanting to go through pregnancy, financial concerns, not enjoying the baby/toddler years), then it might be worth counseling first. If you just don't want to be a parent, then you need to walk away.[/quote]

This is good advice, including the counseling.  This is a dealbreaker-kind of issue, so it's worth making sure you've both really thought about it.  But don't drag out a marriage that's incompatible on such a fundamental issue.

I say this as someone who went into marriage not wanting to have children, while my husband was on the fence but leaning towards wanting them.  I was 100 percent clear that I might not change my mind, he should not count on it, and he needed to be okay with not having kids if he married me.  He truly was.  Eventually, I decided that I would be open to having a child, and we did, but it was absolutely not the result of any pressure from him.    I love my child to pieces, but kids are a lot of work and can be hard on a marriage.  I can't imagine the stress that would be created by a child that one parent did not really want.  [/quote]

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