Reply to Would you feel the same way? MIL inviting herself over

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wouldn't have been nearly as nice as you were OP.  Bottom line, you aren't crazy to be upset. She crossed several lines tonight. [/quote]

OMG you people and your "boundary" issues!

OP, you are long winded and obviously dull with the minute attention to details that don't matter.  In a word--unclench.

How do you get through basic life?  Gee wilikers, if you can't handle saying no to a 3 year old about the park without it being a big production you should re-think any future children.[/quote]

Wow, did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed or are you always this contemptuous, unkind, and nasty?

OP, I'm a detail oriented person and I appreciate the vivid picture you painted.  And I can totally relate to your frustration.  My privacy and space are really important to me.  And I want my home to be welcoming to my MIL, but I am NOT okay with gifts being given at every visit.

It sounds like your DH is not the best person to speak up, and you have a pretty good relationship with your MIL, so I might suggest a gentle conversation, something like, "Phyllis, I hope I did not hurt your feelings by being startled when you arrived.  I understand you told DH that you were stopping by, and he didn't remember to tell me.  I love that you enjoy coming over to spend so much time with [grandson].  And I really appreciate your offer to buy dinner for us - that would be such a nice treat sometimes.  The other night, though, I really was looking forward to a quiet evening gardening with DC and just spending time the three of us before bed.  In the future, so that we can all enjoy our time together, I'd appreciate scheduling evenings together in advance.  I'm not comfortable with last minute changes of plans unless there is an emergency or something."[/quote]

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