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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Tried talking about it with my spouse this weekend. He doesnt want to discuss it because It's too hard for him to think about.  He wouldn't want to accompany me if I had an abortion because it would be too emotionally hard.  He doesn't know what to do but won't face a converstion with me.

This is why I am so afraid of taking on this pregnancy.  It's all in me, in additon to the grim marriage[/quote]

I'm so sorry, OP.  So terribly sorry.  If I were you, I would take this as all the information you need (in addition to what you already have) to know that termination is probably the best decision for you and your existing child.  He can't even talk to you about this...what kind of support would he be for you caring for an infant in addition to your child?  What if a new baby had health challenges?  What would happen if a new baby had to be in the NICU for a long time, or had special needs?  Could you count on him?  Can you now?

I hate to be such a downer.  I'm the PP above with the bipolar brother who died and the bipolar mother who still is a huge stressor in my life.  Even if you get a divorce, co-parenting with your husband is always going to be a huge challenge, and you can't necessarily trust that he will get on meds, stay on meds, be stable, etc.  You didn't know all this before you created your first child but you do now.  I would not bring another child into the world under these circumstances.

That said, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world.  Will be rooting for you and hope you provide updates.[/quote]

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