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[quote=Anonymous]After OP's last post, I'm even more confused what OP's issue is other than some parents aren't behaving in a way she wants and she feels resentful.  The solution to that is not do things with any expectation of others.  That way you'll never be disappointed.

I'm another person whose parents refused to take me and my siblings anywhere. I was only rarely allowed to have friends over.  My homelife was very dysfunctional and I spent as much time as I could away from it.  Lots of mental illness there but I don't think many in the community knew how bad it was.  My siblings and I were so very self conscious about it.  From about age 8, I rode my bike everywhere or arranged my own rides.  My brothers usually walked or hitchhiked.  I always appreciated the kindness shown to me by other parents, teachers and coaches.  They never made me feel uncomfortable.  They probably never knew what a huge difference they made in my life. After I had kids of my own, I feel their kindness is even more poignant for me.

Now that I have means of my own, I drive kids and have them over with no expectation of reciprocity.  I'm sensitive to the fact that some of those kids might have situations like I had. People may 'think' they know what's going on in someone's house but they don't.  I'm also not afraid of my kid being friends with someone whose family has mental health problems.  I've seen that up close and know it's not contagious.  I want to do for other kids what was done for me.  [/quote]

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