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[quote=Anonymous]You don't need to be a law partner or live in exburbia to budget for one salary. NP here. We bought a house in a sought-after zip code and kept the mortgage to one-salary levels. Fwiw at the time my husband was making $75k per year and we both had (and still have) student loans to pay off. We did this by buying a house that was old and needed lots of work and had other downsides. We lived with the smallest lousiest kitchen for a decade, and our house is still way smaller and less fancy than most of our colleagues and friends.

The trade-off is that I was able to stay home with my first child for a year, and could have stayed home indefinitely if that year hadn't been more than enough time to convince that we would all be better off if I went back to work. I'm glad I did it, I'm glad I had the option, but for the same reasons that the PP described and the OP worries about for his wife, I'm really glad that I went back to work. The problem with never having the option is that you tend to glorify life as a SAHM. It isn't all that, not by a long shot! I now look happily upon on all the Bethesda yoga-pants moms in my neighborhood - they seem perfectly happy but it was definitely not for me.[/quote]

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